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Sunday, August 7, 2011

perfume don't lie

last week hubby and i were watching tv downstairs, and the boy was upstairs watching a movie in our room.  when he came down for supper, i smelled something weird.  it wasn't our supper (beef burgundy and noodles), but it smelled familiar.  in fact, the boy smelled, and i called him over so i could sniff him.  he stank of my perfume!  i asked him if he got into my perfume and he gave me a what the? look, and i told him don't lie...i can smell perfume like i can smell a fart in a hen house.  he claimed he didn't know how the perfume got on him.  i understand.  apparently i have attack perfume bottles the same way people have attack dogs or kitties.

when we took the kiddos up for baths, i found the offending (!) perfume.  apparently my bottle of covet likes to spritz unsuspecting victims.  i had more proof when i found a small puddle of perfume under the bottle.  the room also reeked and somehow the A/C got sprayed too as it was blowing out scented air.  once upon a time i loved this fragrance, but since i'd bought it several years ago the perfume had turned and now it stank in a not so good way.

i can't remember the last time i wore perfume.  i used to wear it all the time to work, with exception when i worked at the allergist, where wearing fragrance was verboten.  ironically, i developed a sensitivity to fragrance after that stint and now certain scents give me headache, nasal congestion or sneeze attacks.  (ask me how i know.  i can't stand when people bathe themselves in their scent then sit in front of me at church. and the candles my SIL used in her wedding - yankee candles, a lovely warm smell - gave me migraines every time we went to church, especially when it was warm.  the ladies who decorated the church in the fall insisted on using those candles after the wedding and i used to dread those sundays and looked forward to  winter when they were put away for another year).  after i became a SAHM i wore it to church and on special occasions.  i honestly forgot about my bottles of perfume.

i looked over my fragrances.  some of the bottles were very old and probably needed to be thrown out since the scent would be expired.  i hate to do that tho, becos each scent is a memory.  to wit:


1.  i got covet at macy's in philly several years ago.  if memory serves me, i bought it right before i lost ani.

2.  i purchased lovely during another philly trip.  also purchased at macy's, it was a "fancy" perfume.  i also got samples with the purchase.  i felt so special.

3.  i bough this peace oil at a head shop in bloom during my senior year in high school.  19 years later, it reminds me of my senior year boyfiend (that's not a misspell) and how i used to be hippy/dippy/punk this side of goth.  i also have a bottle of house blessing oil in the buffet in my dining room, to be used when we had our house blessed.  we had our house blessing over 11 years ago, and the bottle's never been opened.  perhaps for our next house...

4.  michael by michael kors.  i bought this fragrance at the bay during a visit to montreal nearly 10 years ago.  i remember the woman at the fragrance counter being a bit snooty to me becos i couldn't speak french. pardon moi - i don't know french!  i felt like big stuff buying a fancy perfume in a big department store.

5.  kors by michael kors.  i can't seem to find this online - perhaps it's discontinued.  i honestly can't remember where i bought this perfume.  and i think i'm going to pitch it becos when i sniffed it it smelled skunky.

6. burberry brit.  i have no idear where i got this perfume either (i'm thinking it was a christmas present from mom).  this fragrance made me feel special and fancy too.  i have the perfume - maybe i'll pony up and splurge on a burberry scarf someday.

7.  clinique happy.  one of my all time favorite scents.  i remember getting 2 bottles for christmas one year - one from mom, one from hubby.  i had to return one.  i have no idear whose i returned (nor would i want to know).  you can't help but feel happy when you smell this.

8.  ckOne by calvin klein.  i remember saving up for this perfume and buying it for my birthday while i was in college.  i felt so hot when i wore this.  over 15 years later, the scent hasn't changed much.

9.  ckBe.  becos i had ckOne.

10. dream angel by victoria secret.  i have no idear which one this is - i think it's heavenly angels.  i gave this a sniff and it smelled foul - i think it's getting pitched.

11. dream by gap.  now this is a blast from the past!  i also had heaven (green i think) and om (orange).  i remember buying them in small tin spritzers.  they must have been relatively inexpensive for me to have so many bottles - i wore this in college as well, and while i did work study at admissions, i wasn't exactly soaking in it.

12. jessica mcclintock by jessica mcclintock.  my mom still wears this.  my bottle is ancient - quite possibly from my mom.

in high school i wore exclamation!  i always got a bottle of it for christmas.  i also wore electric youth by debbie gibson.  proof:

apparently this was called a "dash of cologne".  i found this bottle in the "emergency bag" that was stashed in my car for years.  it also contained a pair of hot pink cutoff sweat pants and a "don't worry be happy" t-shirt.  ah, a time capsule in my mangemobile!

electric youth smells vanilla-ish and sweet.  not bad considering it is over 20 years old.  it smells better than the kors which isn't quite 10 years old.

in junior high i wore muguet des bois, which i put in a stoppered perfume bottle my dad gave me:

image courtesy of

my mom wore this perfume as well.  i suppose maybe this is the reason why i didn't have so many friends in junior high - i smelled like someone's mother/grandmother/ancient auntie.  still like the scent.  haven't worn it in years.

image courtesy of

i wore love's baby soft when i was a kid.  i remember getting a set of the perfume with the powder for christmas (either from nanny and pap or my folks, can't remember which).  i can't wait to get it for petunia.

guess it's time to start wearing perfume again, and making new memories.

1 comment:

  1. Oh my word - I just loved your walk down scented lane! I used to love to wear perfume as well but my asthma and allergies just don't allow me the luxury anymore... although, I just might have to venture out and get some Baby Soft, just because!


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