project slut

instead of making christmas presents this year, i'm being a selfish beyotch and only knitting for myself.

currently on needles...

my sparkly red hat

my rainbow mobieus scarf, which i spent 2 hours tinking cos i can make it longer now

another noro striped scarf, altho it's boku parading as noro. i haven't cast on yet, but...

my sage green/slubby rainbow felted hat, also not cast on.


i have gram's socks on needles, with barely a half inch of cuff. i'm debating frogging it and just making basic toe up socks. will she really care if they're knit in a vintage lace pattern? prolly not. and knitting 2 at a time from the cuff down is a bitch.

and i'm not going there with the tree skirt.

dad's poor antler scarf (sigh).

my ubatuba sweater (hangs head in shame).



i feel bad knitting all this stuff for me. selfish. no one was expecting knitted presents this year, except grams.

but i'm trying to validate it by remembering i made the hats for KDO, the scarves for special olympics, more baby hats than i can remember, kimonos that went to the hospital, and dish rags that no one bought and i reclaimed as christmas gifts for hubby's family (okay, so i DID knit for them. whew.) i'm sure there's other stuff i made but can't remember.

i've been feeling inspired. maybe i'm confusing selfish with inspired. but it feels good to knit just for me, and not knitting by a schedule, which is how i've been feeling for the past year.

right now i'm just trying to get through the holiday. most of my days have been good, but i have my moments where i want to cry, where i wish i had my baby in my arms, instead of imagining my baby in heaven, and what she looks like. maybe being selfish right now isn't a bad thing to be. maybe it's the only thing keeping me from totally going insane.